I’m starting to think that if god exists, then whatever she, he, it, or they may be, must be a writer. Convenient, I know. What are the odds? But think about it, it makes sense.
When things don’t tie up nicely?
When things don’t quite make sense?
When occasionally you have a revelatory epiphany, and everything clicks?
When the dialogue feels flat? When the characters are dull? When the plot is overly complicated? When there’s too much sex? When there’s not enough? When the setting is a little too violent? When you don’t care enough about the characters? When everything’s too confusing, when not enough is explained?
When, every once in a while, everything is good, and then it loses steam as time goes on?
Not only does it sound to me like god is a writer, it sounds to me like god is a really bad writer. He probably smokes a lot and spends all day on message boards at Starbucks, and will tell strangers far too much about the novel he’s been working on for four years, and he’s still trying to get over his last giant screw-up, Hitler, who at the time he thought was really original but realized was really just the same old story he’s been writing for thousands of years. I hope god realizes he’s a hack and should try something new, maybe try breaking into peace or something he hasn’t dabbled that much in, or at the very least gets himself a better editor.